Paige Lemaster 5D never imagined that Go would shape her journey to self-acceptance. Growing up, Lemaster had few friends and received C’s and D’s in school, experiences that wounded her confidence. But her life took a turn when she discovered Go on the online board game platform FlyOrDie in late 2006. Then 13-year-old Lemaster witnessed one player insulting another player over Go on FlyOrDie. “I felt like I had to step in,” said Lemaster, describing the incident. “It was like a scene out of an anime. ‘Fight me’ means settling it over a game.” The player challenged Lemaster, saying, “If you beat me, I’ll stop being mean.” However, she was new to the game, and her opponent was 15-Kyu. Lemaster played 20 games with him and lost them all. She recalled, “He was like, ‘I like your persistence. Let’s just be friends.’” The bully, the player he was bullying, and Lemaster are now long-time friends. Over the years, Lemaster established herself as a strong Dan player with her signature attacking style. Her efforts led to her attaining the rank of 6-Dan in 2008. “You should never throw yourself at your opponent and expect you will always win that way,” Lemaster said. “I’m aggressive because I want to know what I do wrong. I’m throwing myself into a game to learn.” She characterized her reputation during her youth prime years from 2007 - 2010 as being “very friendly” and a “troublemaker.” One instance occurred during the 2010 or 2011 Kiseido Go Server Meijin Qualifier. “Due to my strange sleep schedule, I would pull all-nighters,” Lemaster said. “I fell asleep for 30 minutes out of the 40 minutes on my clock, and I woke up in the last ten minutes. But I still ended up winning.” Her love for the game grew. “I felt everyone else had a talent, and I had none,” Lemaster said. “In school, I was not smart at all, whereas Go made me feel good about myself.” But in 2013, Lemaster quit Go. “I escaped the online world to find myself,” Lemaster said. “It was a for-good quit. I wasn’t supposed to come back.” Lemaster threw herself into streaming chess in an attempt to find a similar but faster-paced alternative to Go. In 2021, an old Go friend recognized her personality on her chess stream. He asked Lemaster if she was the friend he hung out with ten years ago. “At first, I told him no because I wasn’t sure if I wanted to come back to the Go world,” Lemaster said. “Ten years ago, people didn’t know I was a girl and an openly trans woman. I was afraid of what people thought of me.” Ten days later, Lemaster confirmed her identity to her old Go friend, marking her return to the Go word. The same year, she reconnected with another old Go friend Jeremiah “Jae” Donley 5D. At the time, Lemaster resided in Arizona. Donley persuaded her to consider joining the Baduk House, a live and study Go program in Columbus, Ohio. Donley and Eric Yoder 6D lived at the Branch House, a chapter of the Baduk House. In October 2022, she met Donley and Yoder in person. Lemaster played her first-ever game over the board against Jeremiah Donley 5D and emerged victorious. “Playing on the board for the first time was such an amazing experience,” Lemaster said. Two months later, Lemaster moved into the Branch House. After settling into the Branch House, Lemaster continued to excel in Go. Her most recent showing is the 6th Cincy Tri-state Go Tournament in Mason, Ohio, on Aug. 26, 2023, where she placed first with a 4-0 record. Despite the noise from the children at the tournament, she remained undistracted. “It was good, a lot of fun,” Lemaster said. “Luckily, I grew up in a house with five kids. I pretended they were all my siblings making all sorts of noises.” Lemaster sees a “huge discrepancy” between players ten years ago and players now. She said that more players seem hesitant about putting in the effort to achieve clear long-term goals. “I’ve gone through so many students of my own that are like, ‘I can’t have a goal of 1 dan and have fun,’" Lemaster said. ‘I had fun all the time, knowing I can reach that level. I had these players I looked up to and wanted to beat — some I did beat — while others got astronomically strong.” She believes all players can reach a strong Dan level. “People will always tell you can’t do it when you can,” Lemaster said. “Make a good goal, find a rival, and push your mindset against somebody with a high goal like you.” Her advice to her younger self is a quote from American singer-songwriter Nightbirde, “You can’t wait ‘till life isn’t hard anymore before you decide to be happy.” “It took me way too long to hear those words,” Lemaster said. She credits the supportive dynamic of the Go community for cultivating her passion for the game.
